A Happy Wife is a Happy Life…

I don’t know who said it, but isn’t it true?

I was coaching my brother-in-law last night on how to be a better husband so he could be happy when he comes home. Haha. He came out and sat on the back porch with me after getting home from work and wondered, “Did I do something to make your sister mad?” Boy was THAT a loaded question. I turned to him and and thought to myself, “Is this guy kidding? After 2 1/2 years doesn’t he realize when it’s her time of the month? Hasn’t he learned the cardinal rule that a “Happy wife is a happy life?!”

So I finally replied, “Are you serious? No you didn’t do anything in particular. Haven’t you figured out the time of month in which you tread very thinly on ice? And not just you, but everyone in general? I’ve been hiding out in the computer room all day and I’m just visiting! Haven’t you learned that everything you say should end in ‘Yes, dear you are my queen.” Seriously!”

I’ve been married for 8 years now and my husband finally got it right two years ago. We don’t really fight. We have disagreements that don’t usually last more than a few hours. Then we hug, kiss and are friends again. But he understands that unless I’m happy, no one in the house will be. I will make everyone’s life a FIREY LIVING HELL if they don’t lend me a hand around the house. And that’s really all a woman wants, to be given a helping hand; to be given some appreciation for doing all that she does to make the house a home and her family happy. We just want some recognition for the fact that some of us go to work outside the home, bust our asses to bring home the bacon, and then have to come home and bust our asses again just to manage the household and the kids. Or we are home couped up all day with fighting screaming children, pulling our hair out and we are busting our asses managing the household and the kids. Is it too much to ask for some *#$%^! appreciation?!

So I coached my sister’s husband all last night while she was making dinner and while we sat down to eat dinner. Here are a few key things every man should say when he gets home:

  • “It’s so good to see you again! I love you.”
  • “I am so glad I have you to come home to.”
  • “Did you have a good day dear?”
  • “You look like you could use some rest, let me get that for you.”
  • “Is there anything I can do for you?”
  • “Would you like me to take the trash out?” (In fact, don’t ask this one, just do it.)
  • “I’ll do the dishes, you cooked that delicious meal.”
  • “Can I give you a back massage?”
  • “You are so beautiful.” (Yes, even when she wakes in the morning with cockatoo hair…)
  • “Have you lost weight? You look so sexy.”
  • “Thank you for making our house a home.”
  • “Thank you for doing the laundry. Let me help you fold it and put it away.”
  • “Would you like me to clean the garage for you?” (Then do it!)
  • “I’m taking the kids out for a few hours so you can have some time alone.”
  • “Honey, I got you a present.” (No matter how small it is, it’s the thought that counts.)
  • “You were right. I should have listened to you.”
  • “I’m sorry.”

If all men said and did these things, I bet the world would be a much better place. At least theirs would!

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